A Sad Long Goodbye



It’s been a bit of a bad day today. I was woken this morning with the sad news that an old friend had sadly passed in the night. Now this was no surprise to me as we had said our unspoken goodbyes at our last meeting but it was upsetting non the less.

Paul and myself go back a good few years, about thirty to be precise. Now in that time our lives collided now and again but as life has shown me it is not the frequency of contact that counts, it’s the feeling that meeting engenders.

Paul had that rare ability to make you feel special, that you make a difference and that you had relevance in an ever complicated world. That may sound a little old fashioned to the thrusting young guns but can I say this is a very special gift.

I am not one to eulogies but today I am at a loss. I have mixed feelings, I think maybe I could have done more to help his final weeks on this planet we call home but I am sure that is not what he wanted. I know this because he like me was someone who played his cards very close to his chest.

In the end all he wanted was to be surrounded by his loved ones and to feel normal not to be a victim but to have a pint in a place he called home surrounded by people he cared about and who cared about him.

My final meeting with him was when he was very ill and with his wife we sat in the square in Dobcross sharing a pint or two talking nonsense and me trying to convince him and myself that the inevitable may not happen.

To his credit he didn’t try to make me look like an idiot (but in the face of adversity I think we all turn into blithering idiots).

This is a man who made my life a little brighter when we met, made me a little more compassionate and above all made me think I had a friend who I could count on.

So all that remains to say is fairwell my friend I hope your God is kind to you and maybe we will meet again in some other place.

God Bless and my thoughts are with your family at this time.


2 Replies to “A Sad Long Goodbye”

  1. I’m sorry for your loss John. Given your description, I’m also sorry for the World’s loss. There are friends and then there are those that leave friendship a mere word in the distance as they go on to enrich our lives ( as I hope we go on to enrich theirs) in ways that make you wonder why that person wasn’t born your brother or your sister.
    I’m glad you were able to honour his unspoken request not to visit and treat him as an invalid. The last drinks he had with you, in what was as normal a situation as possible were no doubt very important to him and he would have drawn strength from that. His passing has left the world a stronger place because you have shared him with the world.

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