It is matriarchy that makes most villages thrive


I love living in a small village and living here does have its benefits,  I also know how lucky I am to be able to live here. According to my brother in law he thinks I am lucky as well, but as I reminded him a few months ago of the famous Thomas Jefferson Quote “the harder I work , the luckier I get’. He looked a little bemused but it does take a lot of effort and expense to live in rural England.

Now I know it lifts the soul to wake up every morning and look out over rolling hills punctuated with stone buildings and trees but it is more than that. It’s mainly because of the people who live here.

We moved into Diggle 32 years ago when our kids were at the local school, when summers seemed full of sunshine and endless trips to the pub to meet friends and their families.

If you have kids you become the taxi of mum and dad and in-between stable and band practice and your kids social lives its easy to rack up 20,000 miles a year just shipping them around.

Now I know some people reading this think that village pubs are no longer the hub of village life but to a certain extent it is still the case. It’s the bump space for the village, a space were all generations get to enjoy each others company and get to know whats happening in our small community.

Friday nights in particular are great fun, we have a local Brass Band Club which holds the B band practices on a Friday night which ensures that from about seven thirty it is full of parents patiently waiting for their kids to finish practice so they can start the weekend. It is true that most of the waiting throng take advantage of the fact that the bar is open and it is now the place to meet on a Friday night.

What makes it special is the various generations that meet up, we have the early doors crew who wait for the kids and are great fun to be around, we have the golfers who spend the evening discussing what golf course they are playing the day after and we have the Band members who meet up and do what bands do, which seems to consist of drinking copious amounts of beer, (it must be very thirsty work).

But it’s the older generation that never ceases to amaze me. I know to some I am that generation and I know I am no spring chicken but the grandparents who come to listen to the youngsters play are amazing.

Now I know in the sixties and seventies the likes of Germaine Greer who wrote The Female Eunuch and the women’s liberation movement were railing against the role of women in society and making a stand for women rights, its obvious she never bumped into any of the women in our village when she did her research.

Now I don’t have an issue with women, in fact I quite like them, I will rephrase that I like them a lot.

I know what you are thinking but you are wrong, I like a certain type of woman and our village has more than our fair share of them. I think most men will agree with me when I say that I like women who have a sense of humour, who are strong, who don’t take crap from anyone and can hold their own in an argument.

I fortunately I married one of these women and guess what my daughter and grand daughter are just the same. So god help anyone who crosses them.

This Friday whilst I was stood at the bar waiting to be served I overheard a comment from a lady who was in her late sixties taking to her daughter, and this is not paraphrased this is what she actually said.

“So when I took the freezer door apart I found the small spring that holds it shut was broke”. I was so surprised to hear her say that, I interrupted the conversation to check if I had heard it correctly. This led to a conversation about Facebook, laptops, tablets and passwords. It was like talking to a twenty year old.

It fantastic to think these people who are now way into retirement have more life in them that a lot of people half there age. They walk half way around the planet, they drive cars tractors and even wagons should the need arise and are always on call to stand in transporting grandkids to any fixed point on the globe. All this whilst posting on Facebook and sending emails to the council about some cause or another. These women are the backbone of the community and are first in line should anyone need help.

I think that it is this matriarchy that makes most villages thrive and it will be a very foolish politician who ignores these people in the next election or even worse tries to underestimate them as a driving force in the community.

So I will continue to meet up and talk to as many people as I can over a pint or two because thats what makes this world an interesting place to be a part of. I suppose I have just outlined the problem with social media, It doesn’t get a round in at the bar.


One Reply to “It is matriarchy that makes most villages thrive”

  1. I agree totally with your view point- women rule the world, the hearth and the home. And God help the man who crosses a woman.
    I come from a traditionally “patriarchal” society but ask me who runs my house- its my mother. Who runs my husband’s house – his mother ? And perhaps to an outsider it looks as though I run my house- I like to think my husband does and even quibble with him on this but deep down,we both know the truth :).
    Thanks for sharing !

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